Good Bones

June is my favorite month, because it’s our anniversary month. I always look forward to walking down memory lane with my husband and reliving one of the best days. We are coming up on year 13… absolutely insane that it has already been that long. I have always said marriage is hard and it has its challenges but it is not that hard when you are married to the right person. We have had our struggle years, and I can vividly remember when I sat in our bedroom and thought I don’t know if we are going to make it. That’s when I turned to God and dug deeper into His word and I pulled closer to my husband. Recently I have started Holly Furtick’s online Bible study, Becoming Mrs. Betterhalf, and I have enjoyed it so much. There is always something we can be improving on in our relationships, ALWAYS, and that is what marriage is, it is work. I want to be the best version of myself for Adam and our family. I remember hearing someone before we had our girls say that we, Adam and I, come before our kids, and I remember thinking that was totally nuts but oh my goodness how it is so true! Here is a Bible verse from the beginning of the study that we had to memorize and I have just loved it and I never really knew how much this relates to marriage:

“Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the spirit, if any tenderness & compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in the spirit and of one mind.” Philippians 2:1-2

In our almost 13 years married and 14.5 years together we have experienced so much life together and I will say it has not always been easy. I remember through our first couple years of marriage not really knowing how I could ever be “that mad” at him. It makes me chuckle because oh my Lordy have I been mad at him lol. The beautiful thing about marriage is that they know you for who you truly are and still chose to love you anyway. Marriage humbles you in some of the greatest ways, it’s not always easy to admit it but it is true… just ask Adam I can be a little stubborn. Lol. Marriage is 98% communication and being open and honest with each other even when it’s scary. You cannot be selfish and have a thriving growing marriage. Marriage is helping each other out even when he has had the longest call weekend and all you want to do it go lay in bed. When you give from your heart you get back tenfold what you put in. It’s about going the extra mile for someone even when you may not feel like it but you do because you love them. It’s loving them and not keeping records of how they owe you for anything. One of the best pieces of advice given to me was, “if you want to change your marriage start the change within yourself.” This all comes from the inside out, our thoughts, feelings and behavior it all begins from what’s on the inside. If our hearts are operating from a pure place then the rest will follow.

I will tell you right now that the saying that there is one perfect person out there for you isn’t true. There is more than one person for you, but it is the one you CHOOSE to spend your life with that matters. There will be many things in this world that hold potential to distract you from the blessing that’s in front of you. Recently I was listening to the song Bones and this one line stuck with me, “The house don’t fall when the bones are good.” When our marriage is built on a foundation of Christ, and He will help hold us when it feels like the walls are falling in. If He is our foundation the rest will stand the test of time. When the hard times come, press harder towards God and even when you don’t want to, press harder into your spouse. When you are in it not just for yourself, marriage can be one of the most beautiful examples of love.

If you are reading this and you are not married yet start making God your number one and the rest will fall into place. If you have been waiting and it seems like forever , like it’s never going to happen for you it will. There isn’t anything wrong with you God makes no mistakes. Pray for your husband and when that one day comes it will be the most amazing answered prayer. He knows the longings of your heart Psalms 37.

I hope this makes you reflect and appreciate  your marriage and spouse and reminds you of the love you have. It’s not always easy but there is no test without a testimony!