Mine

This Saturday I was asked to be apart of such an amazing event, Made For More, put on by Ruth + Esther. I am still in so much awe of God’s goodness and His grace. Being in that room surrounded by women who are seeking Him and loving each other is the most incredible thing. Sometimes I sit here and I am just in complete awe of God. The parts of me that shamed me for so long, the parts that of my life that were so broken, He is using now to bring glory to His name.

Last night as I listened to Hannah Lane speak; she had us close our eyes and imagine us being at the feet of God, handing over something that we are struggling with so that we can better follow Him. Then she asked us to see what God said to us and for me He said, “Mine.” So often I forget that I am His. That my faults and with all my wrongs He is still there loving me through it all. We are human and we will continue to struggle in this imperfect world and make mistakes, sometimes more often than we would like. It still to this day boggles my mind that He is using some of my most darkest moments and shining His light on them so I am able to bring glory to Him. Never in my life did I think I would be able to speak in front of 5 people much less 300 like I did, but I can tell you one thing I could feel Him. He was there with me in a way I can’t describe. Every time I speak it lights a fire in my soul. It lights up my heart bringing His love into this world in a way I never dreamed. It is truly beautiful what happens when you stop pursuing life for you and you begin to do life for Him.

All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our flesh and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature children of wrath. But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in our transgressions, it is by grace you have been saved. Ephesians 2:3-5

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In my brokenness I put my worth and the value of me being loved in the people of this earth. I trusted in the flesh more than I trusted in God and what His wisdom could provide me. I spent most of my life until my early 20s thinking that I had to earn His love, when all I had to do was trust in His word and know that you never have to earn His love you, it’s always there. I truly thought that my decisions, because they were not what He would want, would make me have to earn my way back to Him. This verse in Ephesians reminds me of my journey and how thankful I am for His grace. We can be dead in our transgressions and I have been spiritually dead many times but it is in the valley when He makes you. It is in your brokenness when he starts to mold your life if you follow His light to get you out.

If you are reading this today I pray that you know how truly great and deep His love for you goes. No one on this earth will ever be able to hold your worth because He is the only one who can. No one can tell you how worthy of love you are, because His love for you will surpass anything you can have here on earth. Remind yourself that things of the flesh do not hold a light to what is there for you eternally. Do not ever think that your brokenness is beyond redemption. His redemption for you is out there waiting, you just have to put aside what your vision of that should look like and trust that what He is going to do will be far greater than what you can even imagine.

xoxo